I had thought, up until this morning, that the Roman Catholic church was pretty much done with excommunication. I had assumed it to be outdated.

I was wrong. It is, apparently, back in fashion. Particularly for Women would-be Priests and the Bishops that try to ordain them.

So, in case anyone was wondering how to get themselves in on the action, here are Wikipedia’s top nine or so ways to get yourself automatically excommunicated by the Roman Catholic church:

1 …  Apostasy (canon 1364)… formally quitting and turning against the Church. Ah. Hmmn. I know a lot of people who’ve done this. Pretty much anyone Irish who’s now atheist is an apostate or, more frequently, a Lapsed Catholic. Also, seems a fairly slack approach to the problem insofar as excommicating the apostate is somewhat like bolting the door after the horse has gone.

2 … Heresy (canon 1364)…or outright disagreement with Church doctrine. Oops, done that as well. Does anyone print T-shirts for this type of thing? And again, in terms of equine escapes, another belated bolting.

3 … Schism (canon 1364), to split with the Church… historically, that covers everyone who’s not Catholic or planning to be Catholic. This explains the lack of T-Shirts: who can print in that kind of volume?

4 … Desecration of the Eucharist (canon 1367) … makes perfect sense: similar to defacing a coin depicting the Queen’s head… which reminds me of a pub called the Queen’s Head just outside Brighton — had a picture of Freddie Mercury on it.

5 … Physical violence against the Pope (canon 1370) … ha, you were expecting him to turn the other cheek?

6 … Attempted sacramental absolution of a partner in a sin against the sixth commandment of the Decalogue (“Thou shalt not commit adultery.”) (canon 1378 §1) … if I understand this right, it would be forgiving or trying to forgive someone who’d committed adultery. Interesting.

7 … Ordination of a bishop without papal mandate (canon 1382)… No fake Bishops. Please.

8 … Direct violation of the sacramental seal of confession by a confessor (canon 1388) … no tattle telling or ratting on parishioners.

9 … Procurement of a completed abortion (canon 1398) … I’m not too sure about this one. I mean, I understand, getting an abortion but the ‘completed’ part… confusing.

10 … Helping or helping to plan any of the above.

I think that’s enough from me. No need to comment on the list. At any other time, I might have wondered why a few of those are included and wonder out loud why a few obvious ones are omitted but it’s Friday and I see no reason to fret.

Anyhoo, according to the news article by Phil Stewart (on Reuters via Yahoo News), the Vatican Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith (or VATCON-D-FAITH as it’s known in the US) has written and published  a decree that now makes it a full-on excommunicationable offense to be a woman and become a Priest or be a Bishop and ordain a woman as a Priest.

As far as I know, the decree says very little about being a Priest, quitting and becoming a woman. Or, being a woman, becoming a man and then becoming a Priest but usually (historically) the Roman Catholic church has been very good about getting down to the nitty gritty and hammering out all the details. Catholic, after all, does mean ‘universal’.

Sean

It’s not often that an entertainment news article jumps out of me but Sharon Stone’s “karma” story is just one of those times.

From Yahoo News this morning (you can click here to read the Yahoo News article), Stone’s movies are facing a ban from a cinema chain because the owner is annoyed at the actress for a comment made at the Cannes film festival… she suggested the earthquake may have some karmic link with China’s treatment of Tibetans.

Ah well, that’s why Hollywood actors make the big bucks. And Stone’s no dummy. According to Wikipedia, she has an IQ of 154.

Amazingly, Wikipedia already has the karmic earthquake comment noted… the update was posted yesterday.

Here’s what she actually said regarding the earthquake:

“Of course I have [heard the news about the earthquake in China]. You know it was very interesting, because at first, you know, I am not happy about the way the Chinese are treating Tibetans because I don’t think anyone should be unkind to anyone else. And so I have been very concerned about how to think and what to do about that, because I don’t like…that. And I’ve been concerned about how should we deal with Olympics because they’ve not been nice to Dalai Lama, who is a good friend of mine. And all this earthquake this stuff happened and I thought, is that karma? When you are not nice the bad things happen to you. Then I got a letter from the Tibetan Foundation, and they wanted to go and be helpful. And that made my cry. And they asked me if I’d write a quote for that and I said I would. That was a big lesson to me, that sometimes you have to learn to put you head down to be at service even to the people who aren’t nice to you. That’s a big lesson for me.”

And here’s the YouTube video where you can watch her actually saying it.

Let me see, earthquake in China because of the government screwing with Tibet… Karma…

Ah well. I’ve got so much to say about the subject but the sense to stop right now.

Sean

I’ve been catching this story out of the corner of my eye over the past week or two.

Apparently, an apologetical missive from the mavens at Microsoft on how the most annoying aspects of the we-hope-it’s-soon-to-be-doomed Vista are actually features (that used to be a joke back from the 98 Second Edition days, “It’s not a bug: it’s a feature.”).

Apparently, the article went up on Microsoft’s server and came down again very quickly… just before a lot of cynical yet savvy bloggers could get their pencils out and their teeth sharpened.

That said, I ran across what appears to be a working copy on the Guardian tech blog.

Click here to read that Guardian article.

Click here to just download the PDF from the Guardian page (hope I’m not stepping on any toes by linking there).

The Guardian does link to the original Microsoft page but that’s now been removed so all you get is a “Sorry, the page you requested…” Clever chaps over there at Microsoft.

Here’s the opening paragraph:

No one would expect a new OS adoption to be easy, and certainly adopting Windows Vista® across a desktop infrastructure can come with a few challenges—but like many urban myths, perception can quickly depart from reality. In this article, we will look at five features of Windows Vista that are often misunderstood, provide their background and rationale, and present the straight scoop on how to deal with them.

I confess: I don’t know what he’s going on about here, particularly the ‘like many urban myths, perception can quickly depart from reality’ – which is to say, I know it’s English. I know every word in the sentence but just don’t understand it.

Oh crap! I love this:

“With Standard User mode configured across the PC infrastructure, you help ensure intruders are unable to get to the family jewels.”

Ok, it now seems this must be a hoax letter or spoof… a belated April Fool gag… no way they’re talking about protecting your family jewels… no way.

Well, hold on… after reading further:

We‘ve heard some of you say that Windows Vista runs slower than Windows XP on a given PC. So what‘s really happening here? First, we need to avoid comparing apples to oranges—Windows Vista is doing a lot more than Windows XP, and it requires resources to conduct these tasks.

Hum, maybe the author’s not spoofing… he may just be a plonker.

He says, in relation to XP and VISTA, we shouldn’t compare apples to oranges… he’s right, fruit is a much better means of comparing: VISTA is a lemon. many of us still have sour grapes about XP and, apparently Apples are delicious.

Glad I finally read the article though (after it was pulled by Microsoft).

Sean

My speed test result from Speedy net (by Telkomsel).

This is my high speed internet supplier at a cost of about US$120.00 per month…

…good Grief, you can cut the irony with a knife.

Every day, they start out well fluffing around the 300k mark… ok, maybe not ‘well’… more middling and then just as you start to need the speed they drop right down to nearly nothing… that’s right: from middling to piddling.

I used to use BlueLine at the office (I still have them at home) but they kept crapping out on me as well. 20 minutes of play nice (up to a whopping 384) followed by 5 days on ice… at US$300.00 per month (and sometimes more).

Ah well, not that much to say and certainly nothing intelligent: it’s only a rant after all.

Or possibly a gripe.

Sean