Sean

Puts me in mind of the old Breeders track, Cannonball…

Spitting in a wishing well Blown to hell…crash On the last splash

Oh yeah.

See it online at the Guardian comment page (with responses and comments on the cartoon).

Sean

A few hours later, checked google on the off-chance that it had gone into the index and was delighted to find that it was already there and respectably listed (fourth or fifth)… not the super dooper top listing but more [...]]]> …annoyed with google again… put up a new page at Indonesia Export for Wholesale Balinese Umbrellas.

A few hours later, checked google on the off-chance that it had gone into the index and was delighted to find that it was already there and respectably listed (fourth or fifth)… not the super dooper top listing but more than adequate. Monday morning, it’s gone and I can’t imagine why.

We’re on the page (down in eighth position or so) but not the actual umbrellas page that was there on Friday night – now it’s just our homepage.

Even stranger, a search of “wholesale bali umbrellas” (without the quotes) turns us up the correct page in about fifth position while “bali wholesale umbrellas” (again, without the quotes) has us in second place.

Cannot figure it out and not sure I would ever have the energy to bother. Just an odd, annoying result.

Sean

Back in August, I uploaded a personal note on Astro Nusantara after they dropped the British Premier League without so much as a by your leave (see Astro sucks if you’re not short on time and have no particular place to go).

Last week, I received an SMS [...]]]> Well, you could have blown me down with a feather.

Back in August, I uploaded a personal note on Astro Nusantara after they dropped the British Premier League without so much as a by your leave (see Astro sucks if you’re not short on time and have no particular place to go).

Last week, I received an SMS / Text Message from Astro saying, “So Long & Thanks for all the Fish”.

It didn’t say that literally but you get the idea — I half-thought it was a crank or junk text but, when I arrived home, my Astro satellite decoder (cheap piece of crap that it is) did nothing but blink the time at me.

Damn it: not even the right time.

(By the way, I might have taken the time to post a few notes on the topic the following week but, fortunately, I had my hands full…)

Anyhoo, on the day, I didn’t believe it so popped over to the Astro Nusantara website to be greeted by:

Sorry our website address has changed to
www.directvisiontv.com
In a moment you will automatically be re-directed to
www.directvisiontv.com

How funny is that?

So, I went to see the Direct Vision website where I was greeted by a thank you note and a picture of people on elephant back… no, I’m serious, look:

Oh look: the chap at the front has a football… he sure as hell didn’t get that from Astro.

A thank you note and an elephant… you just couldn’t make this stuff up, could you?

In case you’re interested, the note reads something like:

During more than 2 years, PT Direct Vision has broadcast Astro TV and become part of the rich family life of Indonesia.

Now it is time for us to say goodbye and not broadcast until further notice.

Sorry, not our inclination to break up with you, the family of Indonesia.

We remain concerned about our loyal customers.

Customers who have paid in advance will be called for the refund process.

We are proud to have served you.

Thank you on behalf of all the staff of PT DIRECT VISION

Aha, yeah. Alrighty then. Oh, and about that refund phonecall…

So there we are. No live football becomes no tv at all.

Now, back in August shortly after one dreary Saturday night when football and Astro had gone the way of Brad Pitt & Jennifer Aniston, I had found out there was a new playa on the scene: AORA TV.

Now, the AORA deal is a weird one I think and given that there’s already a thank you note and an elephant in the picture, you can be pretty sure I mean WEIRD.

Firstly, I’d never heard of Aora until August.

Next thing you know they’ve launched a new satellite outfit and they’ve got the contract for the British Premier League. Only 1.7 million rupiah for the WHOLE YEAR. What a deal. And a half.

And for that, you get the Olympics (on 4 channels) and the British Premier League (2 channels) and the History Channel and the Hallmark Channel and CNN and BBC and, and, and, and Boomerang (?!) and the Crime Investigation network and, and, and, and a few Indonesian free over the air channels… 12 in all at the time of writing but I believe there were only 8 back in those heady early days of August & September. Or it was the Olympics + 8 more channels.

For only 1.7 mill.

I’m sold. I’m not: I’m bought and sold — what the hell is going on? Where did this Jonny-come-lately find the moolah (my favourite word of today) to pick up the Olympics and the Premier League but still be wood post dumb enough to not offer anything else?

Which bright spark at ESPN/STAR allowed themselves into a deal with a company who’ll ensure their brightest product (BPL) never sees the light of day (or late evening)?

How the hell did that happen? Why, why, why?

Oh well. Whatever. Never mind.

The main thing is that it happened.

So, I call Indovision (no way I’m going to risk being cut off by another new satellite provider and, besides, apart from the football which is only on the weekend, I’d quickly go nuts watching Hallmark and The History Channel from Monday to Friday).

And that’s how the story went until this morning when Hep tells me on Saturday night he watched Man United kick about with the intrepid Hull City… on normal TV… for free.

Eh? What? And you didn’t call me?

It was too late.

You f**$%#er.

Then we had a little morning exercise (me chasing Hep around a tiki hut to fetch him a ding alongside the ear) and, after that, we hit the web (we’re just trying to make sense of it all) and, yes, it turns out that TV One (a member of the same group as AORA) is now airing select BPL games live on the weekend.

You could have blown me down… I said that already.

And, if you search the TV ONE website for “liga inggris” and can read Indonesian you’ll see that, apparently, since September 18th, Direct Vision (last seen apologising on elephant back with a football) are now being investigated by the Indonesian version of the Anti-Trust committee… or whichever branch of government deals with monopoly.

Well, something’s fishy… something just plain reeks but if it means easy access to live football, who am I to complain?

I do hope those chaps at Direct Vision will be ok, though… but perhaps I needn’t worry… that elephant certainly looks fast.

Sean

The original article is here: Astro Sucks.

I do wonder what the hell [...]]]> A couple of days ago, I uploaded a short, angry note about Astro Nusantara to this blog and, later the same evening, while searching for a follow-up or news on Astro came across a link to my blog on Google and now it’s completely disappeared.

The original article is here: Astro Sucks.

I do wonder what the hell happened but, let’s face it, who am I to question the mighty Google?

Anyhoo, on the topic of Astro, I’m going to cancel my subscription (hum, reminds me of the Doors…) sometime in the next couple of weeks and probably go back to Indovision.

Indovision are just as sneaky and gutless as Astro but at least their equipment continues to work in all weather (Astro goes down when it rains and the rainy season is coming up soon…) and you don’t have to wait a day for the guide to update if it ever updates. And the remote control wasn’t designed by Fisher Price.

A new outfit, AORA (http://www.aora.tv) has opened and will offer the Premier League but I’m “up to here” with new installations and silly promises from satellite TV vendors. If anyone signs up with them, good luck and, if you can be bothered, to tell me about it, drop me a line.

Sean

Paris Hilton issues tart rebuttal to McCain ad

Very cute: I was about to say, “Is Barrett implying that Paris Hilton is a tart?” but, in fact, I’ll have to [...]]]> Another one of those stories that happened to catch my eye this morning — story by Devlin Barrett (Associated Press via Yahoo News) — the headline reads:

Paris Hilton issues tart rebuttal to McCain ad

Very cute: I was about to say, “Is Barrett implying that Paris Hilton is a tart?” but, in fact, I’ll have to credit the Associated Press and Barrett for being smart enough to wordplay on tart as in bitter and tart (as it’s frequently used in the UK) to mean hussy, slattern, slut, tramp, wanton, wench or whore. Or floozy.

Floozy is a lovely word, eh?

Barrett also describes Ms Hilton as doe-eyed… but I don’t think she is doe-eyed — ‘dough-eyed’, maybe but not doe-eyed:

To the left, a doe; to the right, Ms. Hilton…

Barrett also took time out of an obviously very busy day to pad the article with descriptions like, ‘scantily clad’, ‘tongue-in-cheek’ and ‘revealing’.

Gotta love the news.

Sean